I asked
for more of You
in my life.

And rather than
something from outside
coming upon me,
I felt a welling up
of You
from within.

Bubbling up
from the depths
within me
You come.

Mother God,
Why is it easier
to approach you
in the warm darkness
of deep night,
when streetlights
flicker out
and the moon has set?

Forgive me
for forgetting
to turn to You.

For wanting to escape
into the darkness
and hide.


I have been reminded
that you hold all things.

That the warm darkness
is of You.

Like a womb,
warm and dark.
A place I can simply be
until I am ready
to emerge into the light.


And so
I turn to you,
to your warm
all-encompassing arms,
large enough to block the light,
and fully contain me
while I hide.

I hide in Your arms.

Stirring

Feathery leaves
patterned against the sky.
A new day is dawning.

The babe in my lap
squirms, protesting,
But You are here.


Can she see you?
Are you a familiar face?

I seem to be full of questions
this morning.
Woken too early
and not yet fed.

The wind rises,
ruffling the leaves,
as my baby also
ruffles me


and I struggle to grasp
the peace and tranquility
of the early morn
as the busyness of a young family
stirs.

Grandmother God,
Crone Goddess?
(Let me try that one on.)

I miss my grandmother.
She was an amazing pray-er.

Do her prayers stop with her?
Or do they continue on?
Does the burden fall to us instead?

I named my daughter
in her spirit,
To honour her.
My granny died
while I was pregnant,
and never got to meet
this little one.

But I have great memories
Of her with my other daughter
and with me.

Her spirit lives on
in us,
her children
and grandchildren.

But her prayers?
I don't know.

It's a grey day today
and I'm feeling
grey as well.

Just as well I know
that You
are in the grey too.

Not just the bright and happy
or black moments of despair.

You are here in the middling
the grey
the dull
the commonplace.

But you are not just grey
in the grey.
You bring new light,
new colour,
new sound and texture.
The crunch of autumn leaves,
the smell of a fresh day.

There is more
than just grey to today.
Because You
are in today as well.

How good it was
to worship a feminine god
in corporate worship.

To replace He
with She
Lord
with God

I struggled a little
when I hit
Father, Spirit, Son
but Mother works
in place of Father
and the rest remain true

fighting
for the feminine side
a glimpse
into other

God,
You have given me
this beautiful day
to make much of.

Yet I feel like I am
wasting it,
letting it slip away
through my fingers.

I have so much to do,
yet I can't seem to get it done
some days
today.

I am sore today
it does not help me focus
it does not help me work

Perhaps I could focus on you instead?

Though the work needs doing
perhaps less pressure
on myself

It is not urgent
though it needs doing,
but all in its own time

Maybe today needs to be
taken a little slower
restful awareness
focused on the day progressing
less on the rush

...

Help me to work
despite the soreness,
not through the soreness,
but around it.

To keep getting things done,
crossing them off my list,
my never-ending list.

Progress,
but in its own time,
in Your time.

Do I address you as a parent?
Or a god?
Is one too personal?
The other too distal?

I want to feel you close,
but not without respecting
Your vast greatness.

Mother,
I have a friend
who needs your help.
Will you be with him?
Loving and supporting him?

Mother God,
how good it is to know
that in the wee small hours
when anxieties rise
you are awake too

and I can rest in your arms.

Mother-Father-God
You have given me talents
and abilities

Help me to push through
the anxieties
and use them
fully.

Sometimes
keeping things simple
helps,

but sometimes
there are so many things
that need doing
need attention
need thinking about
that I get lost
and anxious
and lose my focus on You

Simple.
Keep it simple.
One thing at a time,
with focus on doing it well
giving glory to the talent-giver,
not focused on the talents-in-action.

Help me
to keep you in focus,
and the anxieties not,
to keep pushing through
my own worries
into Your arms.

Mother God,
You have blessed me
with new gifts to explore,
gifted me
with new horizons to chase.

But I find myself
seeking out familiar corners,
safe cushions to hide in.

Help me to emerge
into the new,
into the open areas
You are inviting me into.

Help me to explore
what You are offering,
the things You know
will help me grow into my future.

Mother God
of open spaces
and closed corners

of big wide dreams
and tiny hopes

When we're feeling small
in spaces too large

or squashed into spaces
that no longer fit

You are with us.

You ground us

and we can rest
in your loving arms